What would you rather be? A one-hit wonder or a has-been? They both come with pretty pathetic connotations, but there is that famous quote about "I'd rather be a has-been than a never was..."
What I am saying is, that if I had ever written even one great song, I am pretty sure that I would never stop talking about it!
Yeah, I'd be that guy that you regret sitting next to on the bus, plane, train, movie theatre, restaurant, public urinal etc.
I would have it on my resume, and my business card. People would utter a rhetorical "How are you", and I would answer, "Good. You know about my hit song, right?" And even if it was something completely inane like, 'Tutti Frutti, Shake Your Booty', I would wear it as a badge of honour, because how many people can say they had a hit song in their lifetime?So recently, while watching some VH1 or MTV special on One Hit Wonders, it dawned on me how harsh and cruel, and ignorantly judgemental society and history can be. You see, many of the bands were not actually one hit wonders. Some had one song, and some, an entire hit album with numerous hits, which for any number of reasons, was never followed up with any further success. A little unfair, wouldn't you say?
I mean, if I had written even just one full album with numerous hits.....(please see above and multiply by 10!)
Furthermore, what about the career musician or more precisely, the career artist, who never concerned themselves with commercial success, but just by producing a work of sheer quality, gained temporary fanfare before fading back into the shadows from whence they emerged. Why must we unfairly assign them the "One Hit Wonder" label?
And do you have any idea how many talented artists may have given us more if the band hadn't split up or if they were not screwed by their management, ruined by drugs or forced to go work for their cousin peddling office supplies, or dog accessories, or private-label hair products?!
Now, many among the One Hit Wonders of which we speak, are simply glorified jingles! I am talking about crappy, poppy, bubble-gum shit essentially created to entertain children and brainless twits. No powerful metaphors, or if they do exist, are hidden benath the guise of Magic Dragons or Tin Soldiers or something.
Many of them are novelty songs like;
"It was a one-eyed, one-horned, flyin' purple people eater", orand many, many more nauseating examples.
"Yummy Yummy Yummy, I've got love in my tummy", or
"She wore an itsy bitsy teenie weenie yellow polka dot bikini",
And what's worse, is when some schmuck decides 10 years later that this drivel is worthy of being re-created so that the people that were too young (or blessed) to hear it the first time, can now stick a NEW version into their mental file-o-fax!
For example, was it necessary for anyone (my apologies to the ever-lovely Kylie Minogue) to remake The @#$%^&*#@ Loco-Motion?!?!?!
And some seriously renowned rappers got together a few years back because they felt it was necessary to re-interpret the Sugarhill Gang's profound lyrics of "Hip-hop, da hibby, a-hibby dibby, hip hip hop-a-ya don't stop! Rock it out, baby bubba to the boogie de bang bang, the boogie to da boogady beat!" Ah yes, I now have a much clearer picture of what their message was!
I guess what I am getting at is that there have been so many great works of art that just so happen to be the artist's solitary commercial success, but is it fair to compare them to these mindless monstrosities?
I say "No!", but since my opinion is usually insignificant outside of my own house (and even there, it comes right after wife and dog), I decided to hold a focus group. And, by "Focus Group" I mean, my uncle, brother, and a couple of cousins as well as the homeless guy who sits outside of Hooters covered in his own previous night's vomit. The experience prompted me first and foremost to take a shower, but from there, to compile a list of good songs that just happen to be the artist's sole sensation, or in some cases, just part of their lone lucrative album.
Please feel free to let me know what you think:
Me and Mrs. Jones - Billy Paul
Drift Away - Dobie Gray
Misty Blue - Dorothy Moore
All The Young Dudes - Mott The Hoople
Mississippi Queen - Mountain
Cruel To Be Kind - Nick Lowe
How Long - Ace
Black Betty - Ram Jam
Baby Come Back - Player (What? I can have a romantic side!)
Romeo's Tune - Steve Forbert
My Sharona - The Knack
All By Myself — Eric Carmen
Lovin' You — Minnie Riperton
Far From Over - Frank Stallone (Seriously, there's something about this song that makes you want to run a triathlon!)
Get Here - Oleta Adams
Walkin'In Memphis - Marc Cohn
MacArthur Park — Richard Harris
Tubthumping - Chumbawamba
Eye of the Tiger — Survivor
Dont You Forget It - Glenn Lewis
Something In The Air - Thunderclap Newman (This could be a blog all it's own as the band was assembled by Pete Townsend to play the songs of "Speedy" Keen who was a former chauffeur, roadie, and defacto fifth member of The Who. In addition to this song, he also wrote Armenia City In The Sky for The Who, and went on to produce Tom Petty and Motorhead!)
Cool Like Dat - Diggable Planets
Cantaloop (Flip Fantasia) - US3
No Rain - Blind Melon
500 Miles - Proclaimers
More Than Words - Extreme
Let's Get Together - Youngbloods
We're Not Gonna Take It - Twisted Sister
(a member of my "focus group", who requested anonymity for obvious reasons, insisted this be here, and I do not disagree enough to argue.)
I Got A Girl - Tripping Daisy
and I will probably add many over the next little while.
To ALL artists, please just remember to go all out when you do what you do, and if you get a hit, great! If you don't, the world will never even know.
Please note that if I have in any way, spoiled my chances of one day sleeping with Kylie Minogue, I truly and sincerely beg her forgiveness! Seriously Kylie, call me.
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